July 4th.

July doesn't feel like the seventh month. it feels like the sixth. i am writing here again i guess. i was told that thorn doesn't hate me but it needs time. i think that's true for both of us but i dont have anyone else to tell "heres what happened today" other than it. i wanted to see it at the picnic. if it wants to continue dating me it will probably see this eventually at some future point. i am not gonna tell people about the blog anymore. it's just incidental. but i thought about telling Aurora what happened each day but it's not that kind of closeness. i miss it a lot. not sure what ill do without it. i guess, do this. i spent the past week in a self inflicted numbness, i hungout with E again which was good. we on Thursday watched live action one piece. on Friday i hungout with C and we got food at a diner. ive been watching awful family guy reaction and skyrim slop. family guy is truly a once in a generation show because it's just truly made for youtube shorts. watching it feels like eating lead. i miss playing skyrim. 

today i wokeup at eight thirty and wow. 

down to denver, drink, Q drove me along with A, haven't seen A in a year or more. drunk at picnic. an orgy of tits, i understand things now. went and got food with A and L. saw M and that was very good, glad i dragged her down to Denver. got to poke boobs. i was too possessive. oh well. about thorn. went back to Shiv's place with A and L and C, C went home to work. the sun is a lovely friend. watched Octopus. Q drove L and A back to A's place. Q revealed important things.